Friday, August 06, 2004

Wow--this is the first time I've blogged more than once on the same day this entire summer, I think.
Not that I have that much to say. I've been looking back on this summer and realizing how much I got done:

1) Developed some upper body strength through construction work.
2) Had a couple really fun "Men's Nights" with Dave, George, and Neil.
3) Dropped a lot of carbs from my diet and subsequently lost four pounds (to date).
4) Had some down time to do this same sort of introspective schtick.

Really, though, I feel more than ever these days like the future is incredibly malleable. Coming out of last year I felt like I was locked into something (I may have even had a few posts relating to that very metaphor). Not a rut, per se...just a sort of series of bad habits that were leading me down the same roads over and over again. And really, all you have to do sometimes is change a few seemingly minor things, and the rush you get from all these little minor successes gives you a sort of tailwind. My dad used to tell me that a lot of life was made up of basically small decisions, and that if you made the right choices for even a simple majority of them it would make all the difference in the world. Naturally my response was the usual one--Sure dad. Uh huh, dad. Right, dad. In the bored tone of voice that says "Excuse me, I'm trying to read my e-mail."--but I've been thinking that maybe all these little things, little successes, could be paying off after all. Don't you hate those times your parents really are right?
Last thought: A few years ago at Camp Chanco, my small group leader Mike told us that the great thing about being young is that you could experiment with life to a certain degree and the consequences were fairly light. In other words, you could fuck up here and there and it wouldn't hurt you too badly. That being said, those fuck ups are, in themselves, a sort of guidepost. "Hey! This hangover meanst that drinking twelve beers in the course of an evening isn't such a hot idea!" So I guess it's better to view the past, not with a wince, but with a wry grin. Oh well; stupid then, stupid now. Not much changes.


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