Friday, April 16, 2004

Visit here to generate your own random Evil Plan. (Or you can build your own. But the randomly generated ones are funnier. Especially the ones dealing with fluffy bunnies.)


Your objective is simple: Destroy the Earth. [Of course, I'm a Republican neocon treeburner]

Your motive is a little bit more complex: Love (Yes, it works) [hell yes it does]

Stage One
To begin your plan, you must first clone a Superman. This will cause the world to swallow nervously, shocked by your arrival. Who is this Sadistic Fiend? Where did they come from? And why do they look so good in a Supervillain Costume with Gimmicks? [because a handsome man look good in anything he throw on]


Stage Two
Next, you must desecrate the Eiffel Tower [damn right--stupid French]. This will all be done from a ancient tomb, a mysterious place of unrivaled dark glory. Upon seeing this, the world will weep uncontrollably, as countless hordes of corporate suits [what else? Only the best clothes for my minions] hasten to do your every bidding.


Stage Three
Finally, you must release your arcane ritual, bringing about an Unending Cacophony of Screams. Your name shall become synonymous with evil, and no man will ever again dare sabotage your music career [hmm...so I WILL have one]. Everyone will bow before your Unbreakable Will [of course Will is unbreakable--women aside], and the world will have no choice but to make you their god.

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